Everyone but me

Everyone has someone to hold, but me,
Everyone has something to show, but me,
Everyone has something to be proud of, but me,
Everyone has the right thing to say, but me

Everyone has someone to kiss, but me,
Everyone has someone to miss, but me,
Everyone has something big, but me,
Everyone has something to drive, but me

Everyone has money to burn, but me,
Everyone has someplace to be, but me,
Everyone has someone to be, but me,
Everyone has something more important, but me,

Everyone has something to prove, but me,
Everyone has something to hide, but me,
Everyone is doing it, but me,
Everyone is still searching, but me

As Isit back and contemplate why I got screwed on my last midterm while having my third double, I'd like to believe that I'm going to be happy when I finish school with a degree, if I make it that far, and no job prospects with the world at my doorstep. Tonight more than any other night it seems where my priorities lay. Does it not seem a little off to anyone else that we pay a buttload of money for school that we'll probably never use, get a job and pay ridiculous taxes to a government that screws us, just to sit on our asses and pay even more money for the government to screw us again because all the money we gave them from our hard earned pay checks seems to disappear because it just so happens there was a "flux" in the rate of retirement before we could get a chance to retire ourselves? And don't forget that if we have kids in hopes that they might do something significant and miraculous for our country/world/culture, we get to shell the bucks again knowing in our hearts that there's a pretty good chance that they'll face the same circular paradigm that we were in?

Hope. What is it? How does it work? Will it work if we don't believe in it? Will it not work if we do believe in it? What's the point? Is there more than one God? Why is the Christian God the only one spelled with a capital G? Are Christians brainwashed? Is being gay genetic? How can homosexuals want tolerance when they themselves can't tolerate jack shit? Does this strike a cord with anyone? Or how bout that I swore in the same paragraph that I talk about God?

I'm gonna say this once, and only once to protect the identity of the guy who told it to me. I didn't know this guy more than a week before he told me this story.

My friend joined a Christian touring group that spoke to students mostly. Basically from what I understood was they would do some pretty "unregular" stuff you might say Christians would do. During one of their street preaching concerts, the leader of the group started speaking. He was talking about people and if they could just get over themselves and their subconscious/conscious judgement, they might be able to understand the state of affairs our world is in. His comments went something like this, "If you people could just get the fuck over yourselves, you just might be able to see the love that Jesus Christ has for you". He said immediately after words, "Now how many people heard me say Jesus loves you?" about 25% raise their hands, "How many heard me say the F word and thought 'who is this guy who thinks he can come and swear at us claiming he is a Christian'?". The majority raise their hands.

So, what's the point? Ask yourself who you are, not what other think. Look in the mirror and see the complexity, refinery, mechanistic way you're built. Ever stop the think of why a zit might be beautiful? As a science student we're taught to be in awe of greatly detailed work like the body, but for some reason they still think that we got this way by chance. Whatever, get over yourself, then we'll talk.

Buck